058. Embrace New Challenges and Come Back From Failures: Hailey Green [Part 2]

In Part 2 of our series with Hailey Green, we dig deeper into the multi-faceted aspect of being a successful firefighter.

Expect to learn:

• the positive aspects of imposter syndrome as a sign of growth and challenge 
• the importance of health, wellness, and mental health
• the need for continuous training 
• and much more

Hailey highlights the value of mentorship and outlines strategies for goal setting and time management to maintain a balanced life. Additionally, you'll hear insights on the significance of long-term fitness planning, the necessity of having a mental health support system in place, and the importance of building strong relationships within the fire service.

00:38 Diverse Aspects of Firefighting

07:32 The Importance of Mentorship

12:56 Setting and Tracking Goals

18:33 The Power of Organization and Accountability

20:38 The Challenge of Long-Term Goals

21:58 Discussion on PFAS and Firefighting Gear

23:02 The Art of Stirring the Pot

24:07 Sources of Inspiration

26:54 Self-Awareness and Mental Health

28:35 The Importance of Therapy

33:30 Future Goals and Aspirations

39:44 Cherished Failures

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Transcript

Hailey: I think imposter syndrome just means you're growing. You're challenging yourself and it's not a bad thing. You have to accept it and be like, Hey, I'm kind of uncomfortable right now., this is totally new, but also going forward, just do what I can now to mitigate it and feel confident

Hailey: But yeah, it's always, it's like, it's great to have them. We talk, uh, pretty, like pretty regularly as well too. And Scott has, um, he's built like such a great podcast and network of people on the podcast. Yeah. Just to highlight there's so many different ways in the firefighting. There's so many different fields like health, wellness, mental health, um, the different traits, like the nozzle for there's so many different techniques and so many different technologies that we can use in firefighting.

Um, that people like are interested in that kind of stuff. You can kind of like dig into it more. There's so many different in like YouTube videos, podcasts about firefighting as well, too. Um, courses you can take. Um, and that's why I like firefighting so much is cause there's so many different fields, like it's medical, but it's also like trades.

It's also patient care. So there's so many different things you have to be a proficient at. Um, and it's just challenging. It's different every day. Um, and being able to like, talk to them and learn from the podcast crew as well, too. It's just, I've learned a lot, um, about myself and, Uh, just like very good conversations whenever we get together too.

And again, they're all like, they're all older. They have good insight in life as well too. So, um, it's just, Yeah, a good group of guys and Scott, I think the information he puts out there and the questions he asks his podcast and the way he runs it is very interesting and, um, insightful for people who want to go into firefighting to, uh, to understand what it's really like and, um, that we have a standard to uphold as well to just, you should always be practicing things, take courses.

Put yourself out there, go to FDIC. Like there's so many like hot classes in the States as well, too. Or even in Canada, there's so many people to reach out to and just go train with others. Um, and that's why I love about firefighting too. When you find like a good group who are really into it. Um, and then you can just like, I have so many friends I've met through the podcast who I talked to about fitness.

Um, they reach out like, Hey, are you going to this training? Um, I made like really good connections in that way. So it kind of just, yeah. If I ever feel like a lull, um, these people, I feel like they reach out at the perfect time to like kind of keep the fire going. So yeah, it's, it's always like fun to talk to others about firefighting too.

TJ: I find it hard to believe that you have time to find yourself in a little like, I don't think you ever stop. That's why we had

Hailey: Yeah.

TJ: time scheduling all this because it was, it was a nonstop life, which is

Hailey: Yeah. I don't know. Like I, I think I've just picked things I really enjoy in life and that I never, it never feels like work. Like I enjoy, like I get, I love going to work. I love training. Um, I get to hang out with really cool people outside of work. I get to learn things through the podcast and through.

Mentorship and stuff like that too. So I don't know. I just like I think just knowing yourself really well and knowing what you're good at and interested in um And just kind of sticking with those things like I know people reach out like hey, you really good at this I'm, like I I would be but I just I have no interest in it.

So it's like that's okay. So just like

TJ: Okay, I'll bite. So what are the aspects of the flier service that you're most interested in? Give me the top three.

Hailey: three. Um, I do love like the mental health side of stuff Also like firefighter health and fitness um, I also just I love the training aspect and just like Getting out and like training and I know it's like sometimes hard just with our department because you're running calls all day. So like taking courses and networking a lot outside of it has been like very enjoyable and just mentoring others.

I love It's very rewarding when people reach out and they are strong candidates and they put the work in as well, too. I find it's very Rewarding to help other people into the fire service who are Um, putting in the work as like, cause I look at them and I remember like when I got the call and like how many people helped me to get hired into it.

So, um, it's very rewarding when someone who's loves as much as you do says like, Hey, like, I just need help with this. And you give them a task and they complete it and then they come back for more. So I love those people who are like very eager. Cause then you want those kinds of people in the fire service.

Cause you know that they'll also put in the work.

TJ: I'm kind of bummed because you never mentioned anything about like the hazmat side or the tech rescue like it's it is hurting my inner nerd that you didn't even mention

Hailey: You like, you like hazmat?

TJ: Look, I have that weird mindset where it just like those those things just click. I'm like, Oh, no, it's just, you know, because of the vapor pressure, that's totally gonna make sense.

And people look at you like, what the fuck, bro? Like I, I think I did all of the We have the National, National Domestic Preparedness Consortium training, like hub, where they send you all over the country to go to trainees. And I did all of them, a bunch of them, even like two or three times, like Aniston, I would go there for live agent training once or twice a year.

It got to the point that the people at like the barracks where you stay, they remember me like TJ, I'm like, Oh God, I come here too often.

Hailey: See if I got the opportunity to do that though, like any courses, any courses I get Suggested to do or someone hey, like do you want to take this? Or there's any opportunity at work to take anything like i'm doing instructor one right now So any opportunity I can like kind of continue learning. Um, yeah, definitely take that.

TJ: Well, I, I don't remember if we had any, No, yeah, we have people from all over the world, especially down in Aniston because they run kind of like when you go to Texas to do your, your firefighting courses, these are the chances for people that don't have strong hazmat programs to take hazmat tech, to become hazmat specialists, to do all the crazy stuff.

So it was, I think my, my top three would definitely be anything Aniston just because that place is kind of like your intro to this world of. Traveling places for training. There's one in Colorado for, um, highway response

Hailey: All right, cool.

TJ: where you're dealing with all the different types of trailers and the different standards that you're gonna have to deal with with hazmats.

And you can't go wrong with bomb school because you just get to

Hailey: Yeah That's

TJ: they, the worst thing they did is they gave us all rental cars. So here we are in like rented shitty, like Sentras or whatever. And we took them into the mountains of New Mexico. We had no cell reception.

We like demolished a couple oil spans. Like it was so much fun. Like some of these people I still talk to this day, that was like seven or eight years ago, but incredible training. So make your way down here. I mean,

Hailey: Yeah.

TJ: just show up and be like, guys,

Hailey: Oh God. Yeah.

TJ: And they're like, sir, this is a restricted area.

How did you get here? I keep taking a ton of notes. Um, Tell me more about mentorship. You've mentioned that a couple of times already. the focus that I want, because you, you, you said the key thing that I'm interested in is remembering how you felt when you got the call and helping people who just did it.

I think we deal with a bit of imposter syndrome in the

fire service where we don't feel worthy until we have 10 years experience, 25. So mentorship can be hard to find if your mentors don't feel up to it. I don't think you let your time in. Change the mentorship. So tell me more, tell me how is it, I assume it's going to be easier to connect with some of these newer people having been in their shoes a few years ago versus 25 years ago.

And how do you think that's going to change as you progress in the fire service? And now you have 10, 15, 20 years. You're talking to these new people.

Hailey: Yeah, I think for right now, like I kind of know what my skill set is and also like what I can kind of take on and mentorship wise. I know like I just got hired on not too long ago, so my best like people to help out would be the people who are looking to get hired. Um, and that's kind of like what I stick to.

Uh, I think that's like the best is right now, but I think as, I progressed in fire service. Obviously, you learn more, you gain more skill set. Um, and I think that role is just going to change, maybe take on some training roles eventually. And, but obviously, after I get mentored by people who are above me.

To kind of be like this, these are the things you need to do or the skills you need to like be able to teach other people. So I think it's just like always evolving, but it's also on you to kind of want to evolve and change. Cause it's easy for like, if for any job, it's easy for people to fall back and just be complacent.

But if you want to continue to progress, it's like, I just look at the firefighters that I want to be like at work and like, not even just at work throughout the fire service, the ones you kind of look up to and you're like, Hey, like, I want to be like that. How did they get there? And then asking them how they got there.

Or even just like, Hey, like, can I do some training with you? Or like, uh, is there anything you can kind of help out with? Um, so it's kind of like what I do with the people who are getting hired, kind of like mentor them to get, um, into that, like actually get hired. But for me, it's more of like reaching out to people who are.

Um, doing the training and, um, who are more like senior to me to kind of eventually be like them, but like knowing what firefighters I want to be like, um, is a big thing too, but just being eager and like asking questions, be willing to like fail, make like, uh, make mistakes and stuff too. Cause no one's perfect going into this job and it's, you can't, you can't be perfect in this job.

So, uh, yeah, just like asking questions and kind of treating myself like a new. Like a new firefighter that I am and just being eager. So I think, yeah, just like anything in mentorship wise will always be evolving. I think as your skill set grows, you can kind of take on more like training or like teaching people.

But for right now, it's kind of like, I know what my skill set is and there's some things I'm like, that's, you can ask Scott for any like skill stuff. He could do it like a hundred percent. And like, that would be my go to for anything I want to learn. Like just ask him, but I know for myself, if someone asked to do like a certain skill, I'd be like, yeah, like I can do it, but maybe we'll get like someone who can, I know who's confident and can break it down because a lot of people, I find that these senior firefighters who were able to teach well, they break it down in a way that is just so easy and digestible and they make it look like.

I could start doing a skill and they could just explain it and like tweak one thing. And it's like, Oh, is that easier? And it's like, yeah, like I don't know what you did, but yeah, it's a lot easier. So

TJ: Do you ever think you're going to get to that point where you're experiencing that imposter syndrome?

Hailey: I, I, once I got hired, I did, um, I didn't like, I don't know. I didn't like, it didn't feel real when I got hired cause I was like, I don't know if I'm like deserving of this. I got it. I feel like I didn't do anything, but I did. I look back. I'm like, well, like I did a lot of like cool jobs and I did like a lot of training and everything to get hired, but it almost feels like, okay.

Like, how did I do that? Like everyone always tells you like, Oh, like it's so competitive. Like it's going to take you forever. Um, so I think that was like the biggest thing is that I was kind of like, Do I, like, did I get hired? Like, do I deserve this? So once you look back and it's like, yeah, like the things that you've accomplished, you're not in like a cocky way.

It's like anyone had to do like the same like things, like everyone had to do the same qualifications and obviously like luck plays a bit of it. But yeah, like any job, it's like, it's pretty cool once you get your job. And it took me a while to be like, wow, like I actually, I actually got my dream job and I'm actually doing it now.

So, and I think imposter syndrome just means like you're growing. Um, um, and. You're challenging yourself and it's not like a bad, it's not a bad thing. It's just like, you have to accept it and be like, Hey, like I'm kind of uncomfortable right now. And like, this is totally new, but also like going forward, like I'm going to be like this again.

So just do what I can now to like mitigate it and feel confident. And then, um, yeah, I think that's like the biggest, the best way to describe it is just, it's going to happen, accept it and then work through it.

TJ: Of course you have a plan like you, there's a project manager shining through.

Hailey: I have a lot of notebooks.

TJ: Oh yeah, what's your, like, what's your favorite note taking methodology? Like right now I'm fucking with, um, bullet journaling, which so far happens to harness my insane mind the best that I can. So what's, what's

Hailey: Honestly, like, um, I have a notepad and I just write down any of the things I have to accomplish, um, and like any of the to dos or any tasks you have to do. And then for, I have like a physical calendar because I like writing stuff down. I bring it to work and the guy's always like, oh, making stuff on your agenda there.

I'm 

TJ: Do you 

Hailey: yeah, yeah, 

TJ: pens and everything?

Hailey: So I like writing stuff down, but also like for goal setting, I have. I don't know how common it is to like set goals and like break down stuff, but I have like a Google doc and I'll just put everything in there, uh, for the year. Cause then you can just change it easily. And I break it down as to like, um, fitness events.

Um, career wise, education wise, relationships with like friends and family. Um, any like, like passion projects, like the podcast, like that as well too. Cause it kind of just like makes everything more clear. And also I know what to say no to now. Cause I used to be like, I used to be a yes person. Like, yeah, I can do it.

Like I can't. So just like having a clear vision as to like what I want to accomplish and like what I want in my life. I think it's been like life changing for me and like kind of just being able to like dial into the things I like.

TJ: Okay. Way too many questions about this stuff. I love this. First of all, let me just say that. I love. This entire idea of the goals document, because I mean, you nailed it, like it tells you what you can say no to, and in this, like in the fire service world where we know, you know, Our mental, like our brain power is so easily depleted having that, you can call it a crutch if need be, but having that thing written down that you can say, Oh, these are the things that I need to focus on is a good way to bring a little bit of order into our otherwise chaotic experience.

So do you, is that one of those things that you do like at the beginning of the year or when, when do you set your goals? Okay. Three part question. When do you set your goals? How do you track them? And how often do you tweak them?

Hailey: Um, so when I set them, I normally at the beginning of the year, uh, unless something comes up as well, too. So I'll just like update them at like, if things come up or new goals that I have set, um, I review them like every month ish, depending on like what's going on in life. Um, and if I need to make any adjustments to like, it's always, it's just like a live document.

So if anything comes up or like, if anything changes. Um, if it's like a course or something, obviously that's just like when the dates done any events and stuff like that as well, too. I'll just like X, but, um, normally I have like specific times I would like to complete for courses or like, uh, or for events.

So, like, my coach and I will talk about that kind of stuff based on my training. Um, and also just, um. Like there's like races I want to do and there's just like I have specific fitness goals with that and also there's like I think a big thing too people don't realize it's like having like goals with your family or relationships and stuff too like that just like okay like I want to see my mom x times a month or like I want to see like talk to my sister once a week so just like really working on like good relationships too um and yeah just career wise too if there's anything like course wise I want to take um making sure I have that there and um.

Yeah, I just like, it doesn't take too much time and it just like really, I find it, yeah, it clears my mind. It gets everything out. So then I can like really be like present every day. I found that like before I'd always have like this ongoing to do list in my head. And then I wouldn't be like so out of it.

Cause you're just like thinking like the future and you're like, Haley, you have to do this, this, and this. So then I would like hang out with people and I'd be like totally out of it because I would just be worrying about everything I have to do. So then I just, everything is just, On a notepad or on a document.

So it just clears my mind. So when I'm with people, I can just be with them,

TJ: We have had a ton of takeaways from this episode. And I think that just became my new favorite one for today. Because it's something I wish I had done before. Like from the beginning of my career and you, I love how you basically narrow it down to, I am going to spend time with X person, Y time, like Y amount of time in a week or in a month because just like anything else we can half ass it.

I can say, Oh, fitness. Yeah, I'm going to do fitness for the year. Okay, that could mean working out every day for a whole year, or that could mean working at once, like being able to really narrowly define all of those things and all of those goals and being brutally honest with yourself when you do or don't accomplish them, at least for me, that would have been a game changer many, many years ago when starting this.

So those listening, if there's anything you take out of this, in addition to all of the incredible value that we've given you. Gotten up until this point, create that yearly plan. This, it's, it's already end of 2024. You have that perfect excuse to set yourself up for success for 2025. Write that shit down and track it mercilessly and be honest with

Hailey: especially with the fitness. I find that people. If you need to hire a coach, hire a coach. If you need to like buy like an online program, buy an online program, but also like track it, like, I think people see people doing really cool events or like doing marathons or doing like Ironman and they're like, Hey, like these people are superhuman.

It's like, no, we just are really well organized. We're kind of a bit different. Sometimes you just have to be like if it's on the calendar You just have to do it and like sometimes like obviously if you're sick or not feeling well, that's that's one thing but also like some days I don't I think people think i'm always motivated and like I I do love training, but some days I don't want to train some days.

I just don't want to do anything So it's just like having that accountability and like putting in the calendar It's like hey, like I know I have to go do this I know I gotta have to do like this or meal prep or something like that But Just makes it so much easier. And then if people want to accomplish like these kind of goals, it's just organize things, um, and build it gradually.

I think people too, like, like if you want to get into running, just build it up gradually and then see it as like a couple of year plan or like a two to three year plan. Um, and pick something you like as well, too. Um, when I picked like endurance sports to pursue, I knew I'm like, I can't do bodybuilding forever.

Cause I know like, it's just not for me. I don't want to do like the things that they have to do for like long term and like long term I want a family and stuff as well too. So. I'm like, okay, like that's not a sport I want to pursue. So for endurance stuff, I see like when I did do athlons, like it was last year.

I did one, there were 70 year olds on bikes and they were like crushing me. Like they were going so fast. I was like, hey, if they could do it at 70, I'm like, I could do that sport for a long time and enjoy it and then build my fitness up to it. So when I'm that age, I'm like, I'm already good now, but imagine like when I'm 70, so being able to do like triathlons and like running and stuff too.

So it's, it's so cool to just like pick something you're passionate about, but also see yourself doing longterm as well too. Cause fitness should be lifelong and health as well too. So

TJ: And that, that part of the longterm, I think is something that we really miss. in the fire service world because we are used to that very short term feedback loop. We get a call, we go, we do things, we come back and it's been maybe two, three hours and we get that immediate feedback. Yes, this worked. No, this didn't work.

And spending enough time doing that and not paying attention to the long term kind of conditions us. To just expect that quick fulfillment, that quick feedback loop. So making that really conscious effort to say, I'm going to set a goal for two years from now, or I'm going to make sure that I spend one year meticulously tracking my fitness.

It seems torturous. It seems like such a pain, but it's a wonderful balance from this like super quick. Life that we normally live, being able to have those long term goals and long term ideas and how to accomplish them and realizing, okay, maybe today I'm going to be able to give only 80 percent of the gym, but that's going to add up when I look at that year, like a zoom level.

Hailey: exactly.

TJ: Wow. Uh, we have completely fallen off the rails from the questions that I gave you, which I absolutely, absolutely love. What are your thoughts on training and gear with the whole PFAS stuff that's been coming

Hailey: Uh, honestly, like I don't, besides like what I've learned at work and on social media, um, I don't know too much. I haven't looked at actually into it too much. So, um, obviously we had to wear the gear to do firefighting. So I think that's a big thing as well too. And, um, depending on what the exposures are and stuff like that too, it's, it's difficult, right?

Like you need to train in it because we, we work in it, but at the same time, they're coming out with this kind of stuff. So. Uh, it'll be interesting to see what they kind of come up with more and um, How they kind of are able to change the gear and stuff like that So but I honestly haven't really looked into it as much as like some people have I guess so I don't I don't want to really speak

TJ: I was going for the hot button topic and you completely let me down, my friend. I was hoping to

Hailey: Well, I'm like such like a person i'm like I just want to keep the peace if people can make Your own opinions about what they want to do and what they don't want to do. So, yeah, that's

TJ: are you in the fire service? You're supposed to like basically be able to stir the pot at will and just create absolute

Hailey: honestly, I just like, sit there and just, like, smile. Like, sometimes I, yeah. Sometimes you gotta know, I'm like, yeah, I'm not gonna fight over this stuff.

TJ: It's such a skill that like, I still admire a handful of the people I know who could get the entire, like my first firehouse, it was, it was dual company house. So it was engine tower. And obviously we had to staff the stupid ambulance, but you know, 12 people per shift. And there were a couple who could get. other 11 basically pitted against each other like throwing things screaming as they slowly walk out of the kitchen with their coffee in their hand just giggling. I'm like, dude, that is a skill that one day I hope I can master.

Hailey: think I'm just too smiley to do that. I'd be like, or I'd just like, giggle. I'm like, yeah, it's okay.

TJ: The day that you finally snap and you throw like a plate at a coworker, you just text me immediately. You're like, dude, I did it. I finally, I finally did it. We talk about motivation a little bit and how it's kind of be a bit of a fickle thing, but let's talk about inspiration. What or who inspires you?

Hailey: think a lot of the firefighters I work with, um, and also like firefighters that, um, are outside of my work, just like I kind of look up to and people you want to be like when you're, um, more of like a senior firefighter too. So, just kind of like trying to emulate what they kind of have done in their career and learn from them.

Uh, that's a lot of it. Uh, my family too. Like I look up to my, my parents and my siblings a lot there. I'm very close with all my, my family. So I'm very lucky in that aspect to have a relationship with them that I do. Um, also just like, there's a bunch of athletes as well, too. You see just, uh, who I, like people I get coached by or people in my life, um, I look up to and just like their, like determination, their skill, uh, just like should be able to show up on tough days as well, too.

Uh, and also just. Not even just like firefighting, uh, people with like the skills, but also people who are like trying to make change with the mental health stuff, the fitness, uh, firefighter, like with the cancer and stuff like that as well, too. And just those like people who are trying to make a change and make the career a bit more safer for us.

Um, and trying to take in all the variables as well, too, not just. Like the gear or just be like, it'd be like the mental health, the fitness, the nutrition, um, the things that we do on the job to make it a bit easier on our bodies as well too. And the ergonomics as well. So just, it's always interesting to kind of look into those things a bit more.

Um, yeah, just, uh, I find that having like a well rounded bunch of people in your life to inspire you in each field is really good. Like there are specific people I can kind of name off, but, um, Generally, like there are people in every field of my life. I kind of look up to and people even like, um, coworkers or like people who I know who are in like good relationships, like, Hey, like, I aspire to be like, have a relationship like that one day, or like have like a friendship like that one day.

So it's just, there's so many things you can kind of like admire people for. Um, and it's like also like defining what's important to you and what you want to live your life. Like, so it's like, you kind of look for those people. You ask questions like how did you accomplish that or how did you get there with your relationship or friendship?

So I'm being like very curious about those kind of things too.

TJ: You know how they say that you are the product of the people you

Hailey: It's true.

TJ: What I'm noticing is that you're taking the aspects of those people that you admire the most. And you're like plucking, like you're, you're becoming that, that super person, that superhuman by taking in all the good things from those around you, which is.

Something to be to be like there's something to

Hailey: Yeah I think it's just being like very self aware and like knowing Like who you are as a person knowing your strong points knowing what you bring to the table And also like knowing what you need to work on There's some areas of my life where I'm like, Hey, like I need to improve on that. Uh, or like, I'm really strong in that area.

Um, and not being like part of myself for just being like, Hey, like I need to work on those kinds of things. Um, and also, yeah, just working on past things as well, too. I find that, um, like anything like in my upbringing or anything in the past that kind of has bugged me just like talking to someone about it or like talking to someone who went through it with me.

Having such a clear mind, um, in regards to like nothing, like, I don't, I feel like I've worked through most of the things I, that would bug me in my life. So then again, like clear mind, being able to like be present. So then the day to day things come up. And if there's anything that bugs me day to day, I can deal with.

So like those things in the past don't bug me because I already worked through them. Um, and also like knowing if you're at a call or something, it's like, I know there's specific calls that will bug people and like being very self aware as to why that call kind of bugged me. Is a big thing as well, too.

I found um, because there are specific calls where I'm like Kayla I can relate to that my personal life so I like being self aware being like I need to like decompress a bit here because it's like I can relate to that call. So I know, um, I'm just like, I guess like self awareness is like a huge thing as well too.

TJ: Self awareness is a huge thing when it comes to mental health and especially firefighter mental health. And that's something that you've mentioned a couple times already. So give me your take on fire service mental health as you see

Hailey: Uh, I can only really speak about like for myself and like what I've kind of seen, like I, I know like, um, what other departments kind of do for their firefighters, but I know like what my department does more. So it's just like we, I think we have a pretty good, um, team in place. Um, but also having good mentors, uh, for myself has been really helpful, um, but also not relying on the people in your life to talk about all the problems with.

Sometimes it's like, okay to get a therapist and like, it's okay to have that relationship with someone. And obviously it takes time to build a good, um, relationship with a therapist. So I encourage firefighters to do that in advance. Uh, like right when you get on the job, so that, um, if something comes up, you're not in that state where you're scrambling to find someone to build a relationship with because, say, you have a traumatic call, you need to talk to someone, you need a therapist, I'm not in the state of mind to be like, okay, like, I'm here, this is, you don't know my baseline, you don't know, like, Uh, when I'm like day to day.

So I'm coming in to you at this like heightened state. I'm already frantic. Um, and I don't know, like, I don't know, do I trust you yet? Like, I don't know what our relationship's like. So for me, I found it was very helpful. Right when I got onto it, I started with someone so that he knew my baseline. Uh, and if anything did come up, we would talk about it.

Then he would know, like, If I was a bit off or like anything like that as well too. And I trusted him in advance, so I was able to talk to him about those types of things. And I, because I knew like I could trust him, we had that relationship built. So I just know like what I've seen work well is for myself is just having someone that I can talk to if things come up, but also For like other life things as well, too, and goals, um, and I can talk about just like the firefighters that I know, like around my age as well, too.

I'm pretty, we're pretty open about talking about mental health, like I have a couple people I would reach out to and talk to about calls and stuff like that, like obviously my sister and I have a couple friends as well, um, and also like I have Scott as well, too, and I find that some senior firefighters, like I could talk to Scott about mental health whenever he's very insightful and very open about it, but I don't know, like some.

Arno's open about it, but I find that my, the people I work with are very good about talking about calls and stuff too. So, uh, I, yeah, I guess I can't speak about everyone. I can only speak about like what I know, um, from my own experiences, but I encourage others to like put that, um, I guess like framework in place before the call happens or like a stressful call hop or even like a life event, like life is stressful.

You're trying to manage, um, stressful events, but also like you manage your own life too. So. It's nice to just like have someone else to talk to so that when you go see your family, you're not going like, Hey, these are all my problems. Like when I talked to my sister, I got to tell her all the exciting things because I've already like talked about the other stuff,

TJ: Yeah, you don't want to be, sometimes it can be burdensome for the family. Yeah. We know how to kind of deal with those things. We have that support system. It's kind of really hard for our family who is out of it. They're like, Oh, you just told me about the super messed up call. You just had, what do I do?

And that's, that can be a little selfish on our part to just dump that on our horribly unequipped family members to have to deal with and to your point. Of having that support framework in place beforehand. This is my story that that's what I always tell people that the smartest thing I ever did was find a therapist.

When I first started, I think I started seeing her in 2014. And fast forward to 2018 when we lost Nate, I don't remember getting back to my apartment, but before I passed out from exhaustion on the couch, I called her and I said, Hey, the worst thing that could have ever happened just did. I need to talk to you.

But by that point, I had already four years of building that rapport with somebody who knew me and understood me who immediately came back and said, okay, this is what we're going to talk about. This is when you need to come see me. And this is the timeline for what's probably going to be going through your mind.

And I know a lot of the people that I went through that event with were, like you said, left scrambling, trying to find someone in an already super heightened state of mind, in a very mistrustful state of mind. And finding help at that point is going to be extra difficult. So yeah, that's my personal experience.

Like the stuff that I went through is proof that it's important to find that support system well before any sort of event happens. All right. Miss project manager, miss planner. What are the goals for the future? Where do you, what do you have in mind for you? Personally, fitness wise and professionally.

And I think I have an idea of what I want to see if you, if you prove me right.

Hailey: uh, event wise, like I guess, like fitness wise, uh, I'll do, um, a 70. 3 next year, hopefully. And then, yeah, and then, uh, do, uh, another marathon I'd like to do. Um, this is kind of nerdy, but I like to travel the world and do like some of the main marathons. So. Hopefully do some qualifying times and get fast enough for that.

So my coach and I will talk about that. Um, on Tuesday, actually, we're going to set some new goals. Um, yeah. And like fitness wise, just maintain and like build on my running fitness. I love strength training too. Like I'll do that as well. And in conjunction with that, I always. At least five times a week, four times a week, um, do that.

Um, yeah, just maintain the fitness. Keep building on that. Um, personally, uh, one day, um, hopefully have like a family and have, uh, kids as well. And, um, also just like, yeah, buy a house, like all that kind of stuff. First, what else personally? Yeah, just keep building my, um, uh, relationships with my friends and family.

Um, travel more. I haven't really traveled much. I kind of, I'm like, I worked a lot, so I just like worked and I didn't really travel much. So do some traveling, um, and professionally, yeah, like get in like next year I'll be, Uh, second class. So work towards that, um, take more courses, maybe do some traveling, go to the main conferences and stuff like that for firefighting, get some of those under my belt.

Um, yeah, keep helping out with the podcast, um, keep building my resume up. I know like, For myself one day, um, continue to build in the mental health, uh, realm of where firefighters and athletes as well, too. I'm very interested in like helping people build resiliency. Uh, I think you can build it over time.

Um, and also just helping people through difficult calls and help. I think like the things I've learned from my therapist who aren't just. Um, how to manage stress, but also how to like get through life well and like again, like goal setting and, um, time management. And so like being able to share the things that I know with people and help improve their life, not only just their mental health, but also if it's like you're having problems with time management or motivation for fitness, kind of focus on those things as well too.

Cause not, not every time, like I talked to my, um, my therapist or like people, it's just, you know, Like here are my problem. That's like, Hey, like I, I want to work on these things. I want to work on getting in the gym more or like better times. And it's like, what are those barriers that are holding me back from like hitting these times, or sometimes like people don't like look at the athlete or person as like a whole, and it's like, you have to understand like, there's also other stressors in life.

So it's like, maybe there's something in your past that's bugging you. And like, that's holding you back from reaching. Or like getting these like goals in that you want. So it kind of like breaking down those. Um, so yeah, definitely in the mental health realm of things for firefighting and athletes and yeah, I think, um, I have a lot on the go, but it's like all the stuff I enjoy, so it's kind of.

Yeah, I don't mind doing it. I get to do cool things every day. Um, and yeah, I just keep holding the podcast out. I'd like to, and I personally to like build my, um, social media more to kind of like, I, I don't know. I do struggle with sharing my story because I just don't, I don't like attention very much.

Like I like, I like being in the background. Um, but I do get a lot of people who reach out saying it's like very motivating, like my fitness. Stuff and the firefighting stuff. Um, so that like encourages me to post more, um, and get my like message out there and help more people, but yeah, that's something I know that's on myself to like work on and like putting myself out there more and being okay with it.

So yeah, maybe like build my social media more just to help other people, um, and like get more people fit in the fire service, work on their mental health. Love training, like doing training videos, like forcing doors, throwing ladders. And showing that like how important that is to maintain like our fitness, but also our skills in the fire service.

So, and be curious, like it's fun to take courses, go out and network, um, and just talk to people you wouldn't normally like talk to or be around. And then you like, you learn a lot, you learn about how they got in the fire service as well, too.

TJ: Love the plan. And you did say the stuff that I thought you were going to say, which is, which involved the mental health and involve continuing to take and attend all these training courses and just keep, you said the word that I had in my mind is curiosity, which You, I think you're really embodying.

It's amazing having firefighters who have that, that professional curiosity, that being able to look at the world around us and be like, okay, cool. But what if, and what can I tweak? What can I learn? What can I change? obviously, if you find yourself in the East or the East coast of the U S Maryland's always open to you.

And we have plenty of homies throughout the rest of the states through keep the promise, who will be happy to be like, hell, hello, friend, come hang out.

Hailey: yeah. If anyone wants to check out our podcast too, it's Multiple Calls Podcast. And also my social media is HayleyFireFit, so you can find me on there. Uh, that would be Instagram, and I do have LinkedIn, but I normally, if anyone follows me on Instagram, I'll try to follow back. And message me if you have any questions or anything like that.

Uh, I love to hear from people, and it's always cool to connect with people. American firefighters too. So

TJ: LinkedIn. You are

Hailey: yeah,

TJ: proper, proper, well, fancy. God, I got into it.

Hailey: was good for networking. It was good networking. Yeah,

TJ: I bet.

Hailey: yeah.

TJ: there are some people that I follow on there that I'm like, I cannot with the corporate circle jerk. You guys are absolutely killing me with this. So we know where to find you. We know what podcast you're part of, but the parting question, which is one that I did not send you.

What is the one failure that you cherish the most?

Hailey: I think, uh, what would my failure be? Um, I think failing, I failed a firefighting test. Not like the written, but like a physical one. Um, and when I was like small, when I was like, uh, I w I was like, again, like fit, but I was not fit to do this job. And like, I think like failing that I had a good conversation with my dad and he said, like, you're going to fail at stuff and you just have to like, what do you have to do to fix it?

Like you can't, you can, you can't. Again, like glow and be sad about it. But again, like what's, what's the solution? Like, you know what you have to do. So then again, do you have to hire someone to help you put on weight? Do you have to like get a trainer or like, what do you have to do to accomplish this goal?

And then I kind of then saw goals a bit differently and like my failures where it's like, I failed a lot of stuff and people fail at stuff. And then I find that people just give up or they don't continue. But I now see my failures as like. I'm just lacking somewhere and like, okay, like if I failed at this, where do I need to fix?

What do I need to improve on? Um, it's kind of feedback. It's just, You're not, again, like proficient in this skill or something. So instead of seeing it like, Oh, like I'm done now. Like I failed at this. I'm not, I'm going to give up. And I find people just give up on things, but seeing it as more of like, Hey, what do I need to do to improve myself?

So. Yeah. I think people are afraid of failure, but I fail a lot. And like being able to like come back from it and just see that it's like something different that when we're told has been like a big, big, um, change in my mindset towards myself and my life.